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Happy Hockey sticks

24 July 2014  |  News

It is wonderdul that Joe Hockey has finally managed to unite the economics profession. Against him. To explain to Joe what is happening, the current state of the global economy is a little confusing, so a few words of explanation are in order. With rate fears easing on jobs data, inflation pressures seem to be moving prices towards the upside, scaring the markets on the downside of growth prospects and impacting on global credit volatility over the seasonally stressful year-end, which will lead to capital ratios behaving unpredictably and perhaps even rising or falling. Or not. We certainly have to assume it is a possibility and buy gold just in case. I trust that helps. Here are a few helpful words.

Emotional Intelligence. An illuminating way of looking at the world. If you are three years old.

Feelings. Something people have a right to inflict on others.

Fund manager. Professionals who, in the blink of the eye, can rise from the bottom of the quarterly performance tables to the top of the quarterly performance tables, and then back again. All without leaving the comfort of their fee structures.

Growth. Something that is very good in an economy, and very bad at the end of a nose.

Leaders. Visionaries who sort the good strategies from the bad strategies and then do whatever they like.

Markets. Well oiled machines whose behaviour would exactly fit the predictions of economists were it not that people keep trying to make money out of them.

Public servant. A person who spends eight hours a day working, at least three minutes of which is in service of the public.

Sales reps. The kind of people who, if you say to them: “You aren’t even honest” will reply: “I might be. It depends what ‘honest’ is.”


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